Top o’ the Mornin’ to Ya!
TLDR: Discover why disconnection between your conscious goals and unconscious beliefs creates internal conflict and possible unintentional lying, and how aligning them brings the completeness and wholeness that leads to abundance and impact.
What?
This week has been a little bit of a journey on parenting – parenting is a blessed thing to do and experience. Talking with Liz this week about her shower situation. She’s saying to me “Yes, I’m trying to take shorter showers … save and conserve and be the earth day type of person.” At the same time her unconscious is saying “I don’t take short showers. I don’t take fast showers.”
Yesterday we talked about how that’s a lie – not a lie, but the other is a lie. The “I’m trying” part – she wasn’t lying from her unconscious mind: “I don’t take short showers.” That part was unconscious.
We get into that place where is it a lie or isn’t it a lie? A couple months ago we talked about goal setting process. When we set a goal, we set a goal with our conscious mind – “I want to look good and be fit” – and our unconscious mind derails that in the middle of it. Same here. Her goal was “I want to answer dad in a positive way. I want a positive and strong relationship with him so I’ll respond, I'll try to take a short shower.“
One of the points she raised in our discussion recently was “The Bible says not to lie” – because I was encouraging her to say “I will take a shorter shower” and she was excusing her statement with “I’ll try.” That might even not be hitting the target because trying actually needs the full commitment, the investment of doing the action.
I’m really not terrified that my daughter’s becoming a big liar. But I think our conversations this week connected her unconscious and her conscious and got them closer to the same page, got them into a place where they can be in alignment and in the right place.
If we’re disconnected between our conscious and unconscious, we’re gonna feel disconnected. We’re gonna feel disingenuous. We’re gonna feel that conflict with ourselves. That’s part of what I help with in our coaching and mastermind programs and groups – connecting our conscious and unconscious for completeness and wholeness that leads to abundance and impact.
Why?
I share this because it’s normal to constantly experience internal conflict between conscious goals and unconscious beliefs. We set goals with our conscious mind – better health, stronger marriage, business growth – while our unconscious sabotages them with contrary beliefs. Then we wonder why we feel disconnected and disingenuous.
When your conscious says “I’m trying” but your unconscious says “I don’t,” you’re living in misalignment. That disconnect creates the feeling of conflict with yourself. You’re not lying to others – you’re living a lie internally. Lying to yourself, UNINTENTIONALLY!
Lesson
Goal setting happens at the conscious level. Goal sabotage happens at the unconscious level. When these aren’t aligned, the unconscious always wins. You can consciously want to be fit while unconsciously believing “I’m not a fitness person.” You can consciously want shorter showers while unconsciously believing “I don’t take fast showers.”
The word “trying” often signals this disconnect. “I’m trying” means “My conscious wants this but my unconscious doesn’t believe it.” Trying needs the exuberance, the investment of actually doing the action. Without that, trying is just managing appearances while the unconscious runs the show.
My daughter raised a basic point: “The Bible says not to lie.” She was defending “I’ll try” as more honest than “I will.” But the real lie is “I’m trying” when your unconscious says “I don’t.” That’s the disconnect between conscious and unconscious that creates internal conflict.
The solution isn’t forcing conscious goals onto unconscious resistance. It’s bringing them into alignment. Connecting conscious and unconscious so they’re on the same page. When aligned, you don’t feel disconnected or disingenuous. You feel complete and whole.
This completeness and wholeness leads to abundance and impact. When you’re not fighting internal conflict, your energy flows toward Kingdom purposes. When conscious and unconscious agree, you act with integrity – not moral perfection, but internal integration.
Apply
Identify one goal where you’re “trying” but not succeeding. Write what your conscious mind wants and what you suspect your unconscious believes. Ask yourself: What would it take to get these on the same page? What unconscious belief needs to shift for alignment? Take one action this week to address the unconscious belief, not just push harder on the conscious goal.
You be blessed!
